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| from now on i'll be here!
http://www.monstercyb.org/brianna/journal/
with gordon's help i managed to import all my xanga entries there, but we still can't figure out how to get all the comments imported as well....
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| MY KIDNEYS ARE NORMAL. hooray! BUT, i have to take a few more tests still --- no celebrations just yet.
i think i'm very very bored lately. i'm craving intellectual stimulation which i only partially satisfy by listening to NPR interviews with authors i used to read and stalking the blogs of people i don't know. gus says i seem sedated lately. i think that's probably true. why is this so? i'm not entirely sure. there are a few possible explanations but they would make my life seem much dimmer than it actually is. there is a lot to be excited about. maybe this is just nervousness and not boredom.
i've been mildly obsessed with bill watterson (again!) lately. this is a commencement speech he gave at his alma mater in ohio in the 90s. i love it. and i think this is what i'm craving, something very honest and simple and poignant. it can come in whatever form, really. i think i'm going to pick up some books again though. figure out a new art project.
also, this is a little unceremonial (unceremonial? unceremonious? where the hell has all my linguistic ability gone?) but i'm working on leaving xanga for wordpress. i know i've been here for a good, what, 5 years now (good lord!) and this xanga has seen everything from YFAT shows to lowell dances to college admission to my first string of boyfriends to my amazing amazing year in southeast asia to the cynicism of college and to this cubicle life i have now. a hell of a lot. and it might be tacky to insult a blog on its own website, but xanga is really ugly and i don't like the design and all the new changes are annoying and blah blah blah. i know this will probably cause my readership to dwindle from 2 to 0. i'm okay with that. i feel like being on xanga so long has gotten me to a point where i'm too hesitant to say a lot of things. well whatever, no more excuses, i'm leaving! i'll put up the new address later on.
also, happy valentines day yesterday! did anybody notice the google homepage? SUPER CUTE. one of our internal applications at work was all in pink today too. i love that the people i work with are UBER ADORABLE.
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| a few things
1) happy chinese new year! it's 2 weeks till the parade and some of my lovelies are coming with me this year. i am very very very excited for chinese banquet. mmm.
2) lately all you have to do is mention a food and i will immediately get a craving for it. this has included hot dogs, corn dogs, bbq chicken wings, pancakes, burritos, churros, etc etc. i still have yet to find a corn dog.
3) kidney update: i feel much much better! thanks to everyone for their support and concern. BUT, as there still might be something wrong with me regardless of the lack of symptoms, i'm getting a kidney ultrasound (yeah, wtf?) in a few days. i think they should at least do me the honor of letting me take home a picture of my kidneys.
4) my brain is disintegrating disintegrating disintegrating. maybe i will start blogging more so that my writing doesn't completely deteriorate and i can retain some semblance of intellect. i'm leaving out all articles (the, an, a) just to put less effort into my sentences. the writing tutor in me is crying.
5) i'm leaving google in about 3 weeks. why and what's next? topic for a later post.
6) yesterday was my last painting class, which i'll miss! i think i need a lot of practice but i don't suck quite as much as i expected, which is good news.
7) i'm reading this book called wives, mothers, and matriarchs by louise williams, a compliation of profiles of various women in asia struggling with, well, being a woman in asia. i think whenever i get angry i always read feminist literature. what's even more awesome is that louise williams also penned another book about freedom of the press in asia! <3
i'm not particularly superstitious, but the year of the rat is supposed to be a much better one for me, and the rest of my family. hopefully all the crap that's happened in the last month is just bad luck being expelled so we can all start off on a good foot again. i have a lot of hope, at least. change is gonna come...
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| to preface, when ruby and i lived together she would always play this horribly annoying song by badly drawn boy called "year of the rat"
2004
ruby: bri, best song ever! "EVERYBODY NEEDS TO KNOW IT'S THE YEAR OF THE RAT"
me: this is the most horrible song i've ever heard. it's not even the year of the rat.
ruby: "EVERYBODY NEEDS TO KNOW IT'S THE YEAR OF THE RAT!"
me: nobody needs to know if it isn't the year of the rat!!
2008
ruby: giggle giggle
bri: what?
ruby: EVERYBODY NEEDS TO KNOW IT'S THE YEAR OF THE RAT
bri: oh my god, i hate you.
just for reference: http://youtube.com/watch?v=PScUdYTO0UM
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| i'm still not well.
i'm STILL not well.
I'M STILL NOT WELL!!!
in case anybody is wondering how today's doctor appointment went, well. i spent 3 hours in redwood city because some overturned oil tanker shut down the 101. so i rescheduled the appointment. i got there and was told:
a) my last symptom would probably go away
b) last week's diagnosis turned out to be negative. but nobody told me because my doctor was on vacation. so i had to take another test, and i'll probably not get a call about that one either and i'll spend all of tomorrow haranguing the advice nurse to tell me what the results are and what actually is/was wrong with me.
and my cough came back.
I JUST WANT TO BE HEALTHY.
MAKE ME HEALTHY!
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